❤For the last three days it feels like I have been undergoing a heart and soul transformation!!! I have been powerfully sensing the Holy Spirit working from within this fragile temple.
It has caused me to cry, to laugh, to reflect, to repent and to desire more to draw deeper into my Father’s arms. Somehow I have felt the Holy Spirit opening up areas in my heart that have been closed for a long time.
I think the tears have been coming from the parts within my soul that are being cleansed. It’s so true that we are each like an onion! We have all these layers protecting our heart and each time we go deeper with God there is more peeling away of self.
When the Father peels, He also heals. ❤
I have purposed in my heart (many times!) that I want nothing less than to be and to stay on the narrow path. I want to hear my Father say to me one day, ‘well done good and faithful servant’.
This morning I was thinking about being a disciple, about ‘following’ Jesus, not just glancing at Him. I was picturing what it was like when He walked the earth and asked His disciples to follow Him. In Matthew 9:9 we read: “Then as Jesus passed on from there, He saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax office. And He said to him, “Follow Me”. And he arose and followed Him.” ><((((º>
This call to Mathew and to the rest of the disciples I believe is the same call that He makes to everyone of us! It’s a definite “call” though which cannot be manufactured or entertained in our own strength. Understanding more fully what it means to follow Him is a challenging but worthwhile pursuit, and well worth every drop of blood, sweat and tears.
When I first started my journey as a Christian I had to leave behind a way of life that I was very accustomed to. I was heavily involved in the New Age and all that’s involved in it. I just could not live that way anymore.
Through the years I found that there is a continual work of the Holy Spirit in our lives that we call ‘sanctification’. Sometimes it’s tough because it calls us to die to self, change our way of thinking and to let go of pride, popularity, people and all kinds of stuff. From my experience we all have a tendency to put walls or guards up around our heart, especially as a result of hurt or disappointment. For the past few days however. God in His infinite love has been exposing and dismantling some of these walls. †
I needed to be honest with Him and to confess that I had lost some of that spark, that excitement and anticipation of knowing and following Him. My first love was more like a second hand love for Him!
I then asked God to help me to love Him like He wants. I have learned one thing very well! I can’t do anything in my own strength to please Him!! It is only total surrender to and reliance on God that can make Him smile. The word ‘surrender’ can be a little scary and is never easy, but when we have a revelation of the nature and character of the One we are surrendering to it is more appealing than surrendering to the desires and cravings of pleasure.
It’s a moment by moment choice to ‘follow’ Him and to live by faith rather than feelings.
So if you find yourself on your knees asking Him to work in you and through you, I believe He will and He does.
I was reminded of this scripture in Ezekiel 36:26-27, 29 "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them. I will deliver you from all your uncleannesses."
Notice how many times God says “I WILL”. Thankfully, it’s not up to me to make this spiritual journey “work”. Yes I need to co-operate with everything He tells me, but I am learning to wait for His instructions, His initiatives, His power before engaging in any spiritual battles. The good works that we do accomplish are meant to be the fruit of the Spirit working in and through our lives. Perhaps it is the continual pruning in our lives and the gradual dying to self that determines if we truly belong to Him or are just playing games.
Lord, please help me be willing!
And a thought on finishing. In Matthew 7:21-23 we read,
“Not everyone who says to Me “Lord, Lord”, shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me on that day, “Lord, Lord have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?” And then I will declare to them, ”I never knew you, depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!” The phrase ‘I never knew you’ refers to a very close and intimate relationship as in marriage.
So the bottom line is - Let’s get intimate and stay intimate with the Lover of our soul!
Lord, draw us deeper!